Is this a midlife crisis?

I have either made a major step forward in my life or one helluva screwup. I quit my job yesterday, a job where I have been for 5 years and ended making $8 an hour. This employer (a family run operaton) hired a new girl a year ago (just at Christmas time), and I started noticing she was getting a ton of hours and no extras thrown my way. After my cruise last May, I had a conversation with the boss, and asked why she was making $8 an hour and in a full time position and nothing was offered to me. Dumb me, I listened and finally realized - HE GAVE ME NO ANSWERS WHATSOEVER. He offered me a quarter an hour raise - to a whopping $7.75 an hour. that was June 2005.

At Christmas time - the boss and I were working a Sunday before Christmas and as I laid the daily deposit record on his desk, he had the payroll record opened, and I noticed this girl wasn't making $8 an hour - she had been making $10 an hour since June. So apparently after our wonderful discussion and I was under the belief that our wages were in sync (somehwat) - fool that I am. Now I realize that after appeasing me, he gave her a $2 an hour raise.

I know he didn't offer me full time, because he didn't want to offer me health care, since I had had a triple bypass in 2004. Which is't a worry, because I have lousy health coverage with my late husbands pension. Anyway, I have been upset since December, and have been loosing sleep, wondering how to approach the subject again. You have to understand, I do not like confrontations, I can hold my own when confronted, but to initiate one - NOT. So Sunday, I laid the groundwork for my feelings in an email to the boss and hit the "send" button. His reply was "we will have a face to face on Tuesday" my next scheduled day to work.

Everything was chummy when I got to work. The boss's daughter didn't show up for work nor did the "full time" competitor, just the boss's wife. Hmmm... something is awry. At 1:00 pm he finally called me in his office and we started a conversation that went nowhere fast. Again, he could not answer my questions. Since he has only been an "owner" of a business for 13 years, I asked him to draw on his years as an employee, and how would he feel if the roles were reveresed? Duh, he really seemed like a moron. He made it clear that I was not getting any more hours and the $8 was the best he could do. Silence. I then asked, what was the best he could do to "bridge the gap" between our pay. Get this - $8.25 an hour. Let's see - she's making $10 - me to $8.25. I said "NO" and I had to leave. He said he was sorry to see me go and he was going to have to hire two part timers after I left. Now do the math, even at minimum wage he wuld be shelling out $10.30 an hour then. OK - I must have been born yesterday.

It is not like I have any savings and can afford to do this, but emotionally and mentally I had to sever the relationship. I am scared to death right now. I do not want to depend on theson, and fear of the future is great. The son arranged for my cruise while he was home, and if I could get a refund for him I would, but to late for that. I will figure something out. I truly do not like where I am at this point in my life, but things will work out I am sure.

Hope you all enjoyed this diatribe - rambling on at its best. Later.